The bad in “love”
really? Not again.
We all know it still, we are unable to understand the whole cycle. Is it the love that is bad or is it the things that surround love? The whole dynamic of this love business is like a puzzle for most of us. This thing has been around for centuries but I don’t understand the rate of its development. I mean are we ready to understand that all this advancement, science, technology and all other big things human are proud to develop failed in front of this thing. But how?
Aren’t we one of the most comfortable generation? Aren’t we one of the most resourceful generation till now? Aren’t we are much more technically advanced than we were a hundred years ago but still, most of us are just typing our lives away. 😂. Jokes apart, but all I want to say is all these things are leading to too much involvement or isolation from our loved ones whether it is your family or your partner. We all know the many aspects of each other but do we know the things that we should know? Are we ready to accept that “ your parents are a person too and they are not just your parents” or “your partner doesn’t have to be all the things you want them to be “ because trust me all the changes are not good and some of them can lead to disruption of one’s character.
Both these statements are heavy to understand so let’s look at them again. When we are growing, we become so busy in our growth and mistakes that keep happening in our lives because we are still growing up. Adulting is hell. it is normal to mess up because it is part of growing right? But aren’t our parents are growing up? Do you think after becoming a parent they have lost their right to do mistakes and take it as their lesson? So why the judgement is too hard? Please don’t hold grudges and let yours and their mistakes go. Don’t take every action of them too hard to your heart. Not everything should lead to “ my parents have scarred me “. There are far more harshest and horrendous things that happen and lead to the pain of a lifetime for many children and even adults. The disruption of character follows as things happen whether it is your family, partners or any other loved one. When there is change and formation of something that wasn’t there in a person from start. This change can be engineered in someone from the expectations, to fit in, to hold space or just to belong in others life. Many changes help us to grow but some of them change us in a manner that we lose our actual personality. The loss may or may not hit you when it happened but it will create a hollowness that you can never fill with any other presence.
The ease to approach, to be near and to be always a touch away from our loved ones is gradually taking more space in our lives rather than appreciation. The things that were supposed to bring us near is putting the distance that wasn’t there in old times. To make the difference is hard, we all have normalised the availability so much that unavailability becomes a crime. Most of us think that being emotionally distanced is keeping us safe. The safety of being in touch with your emotion has become rare. Accountability, responsibilities and understanding are treated as a very high standard when all these are just the basic. What you are looking for from your family, partner, friends or sometimes even from a stranger starts from you. Good or bad, love is lead by humans . So if it bad look for humans who see it as good. You will find all the good in love. If you know what I mean.
Ayana Arora.
the bad in “love “
